A passenger sat in an Airbus A320 window seat (17A). The cushion lacked imprint memory, nor did the pad fit to form. The backrest upright angle was one hundred degrees; when reclined, one hundred and ten. The armrests, for this body type, caused the shoulders to shrug. The personal (non-carry-on) item was not dimensionally correct. As a result, the item (a computer sling bag) protruded beyond the floor space allotted, forcing splayed feet and tucked knees. However, this confined ergonomic design distributed the amount of square footage claimed. Discomforted, the passenger now knew how a besmirched troll can feel like an embittered gargoyle.

The overhead eyeball vent hissed a combination of fresh air and diesel [jet] engine exhaust. The cabin HVAC recirculation infused the essence of a flame-broiled hamburger and french-fries that were brought onboard. The vent nozzle was twisted close in the hope of decreasing the fragrant permeation, the odoriferous complexity, which distracted attention away from the activity happening outside the port window.

A baggage handler stepped into view from beneath the airplane wing. He was not wearing the typical fluorescent heavy-duty canvas jumpsuit. Instead, the uniform was a t-shirt, tan cargo pants, leather high-top sneakers, dark sunglasses, and a trapper hat: the fleece-lined ear-flaps, folded down. The handler, completing the task, climbed into his electric tug tractor and drove away towing empty trailers. Simultaneously, a nondescript, faded traffic-yellow delivery van approached, but made a wide u-turn as a police SUV intercepted the vehicle and pursued slowly.

II

While the alleged suspect chase scene played out on the tarmac, inside the plane, an attendant pantomimed the fastening of a seatbelt, the positioning of an emergency oxygen mask, while a colleague explained the procedures via the audio system. Afterwards, the pilot announced the flight plan, then asked that the window shades remain open during takeoff as well as the tray-tables remain upright and locked. Stated was the fact that turbulence during the flight was expected and that seatbelts should remain fastened if not using the restroom. The pilot paused, cuing the attendant to show the passengers where the restrooms were located: "one up front, two in the rear." After the hint, the introduction concluded with pointing to the locations of the emergency exits.

"A friendly reminder, vaping or smoking of any kind is not permitted in the restroom or cabin area. Please put your phones, tablets and/or computers into airplane mode, or turn them off to save the device battery. As a courtesy to our Silver and above subscriber fliers, free onboard WiFi is available. For those passengers who wish to become a subscriber flier, ask for a form to fill out. Touchless payment is an option for immediate subscription fulfillment as well as for those who prefer the one-time fee to access the WiFi service during this flight. Once the pilot gives the 'Okay', the snacks and beverages cart will be accessible to those who would like to make a purchase. Oh yes, headphones must be worn when watching a video or listening to music."

"If watching a video, lowering the volume completely is an option," the pilot chimed in before asking the flight attendants to prepare for takeoff.

The airplane backed away from the gate, and taxied towards the runway.

III

The AirBus stopped at the threshold. While the pilot waited for permission from the traffic controller to proceed with takeoff, the passenger got from his sling bag side pocket squishy foam earplugs. He pinched the cone-tip and pressed the plug into the auditory canal before the foam could expand back to full size. The standstill engine rev was muffled; however, as the RPMs increased when the plane sped down the runway at one hundred-sixty miles per hour, the earplugs seemed less effective--until the tires left the ground and the landing gear retracted into the wheel well: a hydraulic whine, a compartment thud. Aerodynamic whir--the plane continued to climb to a cruising altitude.

The passenger's eardrums began to pressurize the instant the plane lifted. Yawning did mitigate the problem, but only for a few seconds; repeating the solution made him think of a goldfish trying to consume flakes floating in a bowl of stagnant water. He began hyperventilating. He shut the window shade, closed his eyes. Ten/fifteen seconds or more later, he tried a different course of action to relieve the tympanic discomfort.

IV

The passenger reached beneath the seat in front and grabbed the sling bag. He unzipped the center section, retrieved a crisp sweet apple, which was brought along in case of low blood sugar. He took a bite: crunch, munch, munch, munch. Chewing the bite thoroughly, an idea entered his mind. He unlatched the tray-table, and placed the apple (skin-side) on the plastic surface. Sewn to the crossbody strap of the sling-bag, a slender pouch--inside was an oatmeal protein bar: cinnamon raisin walnut. He removed the wrapper and bit: nosh, nosh. He thought for a second or two, then pressed the earplugs gently to secure them in place.

Crunch, munch-munch-munch, nosh-nosh... Crunch, munch-munch-munch, nosh-nosh....

The sonorous escape began the pressure buildup-release between the ears.

Salivation!

V

After several crunches, munches and noshes, the plane leveled off at thirty-six thousand feet, according to the pilot. The passenger placed the apple core into the snack wrapper, set the wrapper onto the tray-table. He removed the earplugs and returned them to the side pocket.

Eased, the passenger settled: eyelids drowse, chin bobs, shoulders droop, body tilts. The lungs heaved--a nasal sigh.